— I spent the night at my best friend’s house and today we went to a shopping district near her dorm and it was so much fun
— AND I spontaneously agreed to getting frozen custard while we were out…I generally plan everything ahead of time so that was a win!
— That’s about all I have to say about today. Once I got home from her place, I’ve just been relaxing
Feeling guilty from the moment you wake up about what you ate yesterday is one of my favorite things.
You would be surprised with how many people in your life could be going through depression at this very moment. People hide it like a paper bag over their heads out of fear of being judged, made fun of, seen as weak, or just not taken seriously. Depression should not be taken lightly, it holds us down from our purpose and potential in life. Those who tell you that it doesn’t exist have never experienced depression in their life, therefore not understanding the symptoms and how it’s something that cannot be fixed in a day! So if you think you are depressed or if you think you know someone else who is, please talk to a friend, a family member, or anyone else in your life that you trust - never overlook the possibility of seeing a doctor for more professional help!! Your feelings are real, your feelings are shared upon millions. Don’t hide it, talk to someone about it. With the right help, you can rediscover your confidence and begin life anew with our undying love and support!
We are right here!!
(Very Delayed) Update 9/27
— Today was the day that I moved out from college and it was super stressful and triggering
— I ate icecream and didn’t feel painfully guilty afterward (and it’s also a hge win because 9 times out of 10 I end up purging icecream)
— I am spending the night at my best friend’s dorm and it has been a lot of fun
I feel so guilty for eating breakfast this morning.
— I went for my blood work and EKG today and I scheduled an appointment for a physical on Wednesday so I am hoping to be able to fax in all the medical paper work to the treatment center and be approved to start two mondays from now (October 6th)
— Despite how low I felt today I didn’t act out on any of my urges (self harm and purging mainly) so I guess that is a good thing
— Tomorrow is the day I am going to move my stuff out of my dorm and turn over the keys (yay having my art stuff back at home!)
— My anxiety was super high today…like couldn’t be around people or anything without my heart racing and shaking
— I got to hang to with my best friend because she was home from college this weekend and we might be going to an lgbt+ bar for glow night tomorrow if I get done moving in time
— My goal for tomorrow is to not skip breakfast since I’ll be up in plenty of time to have it before I leave to go retrieve my stuff